Thoughts on Trust and Feedback

One valuable thing I’ve learned in my career is that trust unlocks feedback. And feedback is the main driver of how we grow and build great teams.

In our careers, and even in our relationships, we make mistakes constantly. They show up in our planning, in the decisions we make, and in how we communicate. I’ve come to realize that this is not necessarily a problem. While we should always strive for excellence and learn from our past mistakes, if we find ourselves no longer making them it likely means our roles are no longer growing in scope. As we stretch into new territory, it’s important that we optimize for discussing mistakes openly.

Throughout my career, I’ve found that trust creates an environment where feedback flows naturally. When you trust your teammates, friends, or partners, you can be more vulnerable. You can admit when you’re confused about an architectural decision. You can ask for feedback on a presentation or a tough conversation without defensiveness. You can say “I think we’re heading in the wrong direction” before it’s too late.

This vulnerability isn’t weakness – it’s what enables growth. The most impactful conversations often start with honesty: “I’m struggling with this,” “I think I could have done this better,” “What am I missing?”

Here’s the compounding effect: the more you engage in these honest exchanges, the stronger the trust becomes. Trust enables vulnerability, vulnerability enables feedback, and feedback creates opportunities for growth. Each cycle makes the next one easier.

One moment that cemented this for me happened when I was leading a major money-movement project at Común. I was pushing an aggressive timeline, trying to hit tight deadlines while coordinating mobile app approvals. A coworker I have a strong relationship with pulled me aside and said, “We’re pushing too hard. The timelines are unrealistic with the app store requirements.” I hated hearing it, but because I trusted them, I slowed down, reset expectations with the team, and we adjusted the plan together. That single exchange kept the project on track, and it made the next hard conversation easier for both of us.

What’s worked for me: I’ve learned not to limit feedback to manager one-on-ones. Your peers, reports, cross-functional partners, family, and friends all see different aspects of how you show up. I make it a habit to end one-on-ones and personal check-ins at work by asking: “What’s one thing I could be doing better?” “What should I start or stop doing?” or even “What do you need more of from me right now?”

It’s uncomfortable at first, but that discomfort is where growth happens. I’ve consistently been surprised by how much people appreciate being asked these kinds of questions. A similar approach can be applied to personal relationships as well.

I’ve found that both work and life become more fulfilling when you can feel yourself improving. Trust and feedback are how I’ve gotten there, and the same loop keeps strengthening the relationships I value most.